Apr 7, 2011

Majestic Endeavors

The Wife manages an SF Food Bank on Monday afternoons.
A little over two weeks ago she sent me this picture.

Food Bank Sardines
I didn't get it till later for one reason or another and then we were home together and I just couldn't understand: After all these years, After all these Tins, After all these beers, After all these Wins, how could she not bring it on home. (Wait. Stop. Watch that last link. Kick it up to fullscreen. 1970. At 3:23 tell Jimmy Old Nevermore wants his jeans back. At 6:05 tell Jimmy I want my mind back. watch out, watch out now.)

She claimed She didn't bring home the first Bag because the food product was expired and there was no way She was tasting from it.

I was mildly upset.

So this past Monday She brings home two Bags of Sardines.

They are expired.

I'm hesitant yet curious. I'm not going to do any fancy plating. I'm going to open some windows. Let the storm breeze in. Open the bags and dump them in bowls.
The Wife is in class. Miles away.

The In Louisiana Hot Sauce of course has me intrigued but it says on the back Best Used By:06/2010. I'm not even going to show them to you. They smell fine and look fine but Nope, No Way. I will not endure food poisoning voluntarily. I've ingested many things. Animal, Mineral, Vegetable, Chemical. Felt the poisons course through my body. I'll find these again, in a fresher state and report back. Now that I know they exist.

This is in no way a critique of Majestica.
Let me say that again.
This is in no way a critique of Majestica.

I want to try them. The back label says Wild Caught/Product of Thailand/MSG/Thickner. Imported by P.K. Food Corp.
P.K. Food Corp., located in San Leandro, California was established in 1996 as a food importer and rice distribution conduit from Thailand to the United States. Business began with Asian trade in the Bay Area, but soon expanded to other Asian Markets in Hawaii, Houston, Los Angeles, Seattle, and New York.

The Majestica Brand was created and lauched with Family Dollar, Sam's Club, Wal-Mart, and Western Food Products (Shop Rite). The business necessitated the opening of warehouse facilities in Newark, Baltimore, Atlanta, Reno, Seattle, and the home office in San Leandro.

Today, the PK Food product line offers a variety of the very best from Thailand, including long grain Jasmine rice, parboiled rice, fruit products, seafood in cans, and cracker salads.

I commend P.K. for donating these to the SF Food Bank system. I hope families around the Bay Area are cooking these up into a tasty recipe. Please cook them up to a nice simmer.

With McDeath's offering 20 pieces of chicken parts for $4.99 and pizzas going 2 for $10 People can't afford Not to feed their families this way. It's not a choice, it's survival.

Sometimes it's just food.

I'm not even close to a humanitarian. I blow by Street Sheets and Red Cross volunteers with only a glimmer of guilt. But the Wife is working hard. She runs a Food Bank and works with children that need help. Everyday She faces the true reality that people endure.

Normally, every week, I see the Red Cross volunteers and I just say "Thanks" or "Thanks for being out here", next week when I pass those same kids on the corner I'm going to snap a Fiver in the air. I'm not going to stop and listen, and I won't do it again soon. But there are a lot of Fucking People On This Planet and once in awhile I gotta do a little more than I'm doing.
The hot sauce sardines had potential, the mustard kinda blech. Send flowers to Oakland Medical Center Room 666.


La Sardine Eblouie said...

Send them to France ! we've got the stomachs here for this kind of experiments ! And always eat sardine cans once the date is at least expired for two years : I keep telling you that's when they are the best…
Don't believe stupid nutrition rules, trust old french taste !!!

Anonymous said...

I can say from the 99 cent store, that the only Thailand sardines that I liked were the ones in the PURPLE tin.


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